#anotherearthart is a feature in which we get people to tell us which artwork or fashion image they’d choose if they had to leave earth today and go to a brand new world empty of all our art. The idea being to find out more about people through their artistic interests. That and to look at some nice images.
The Last Supper – Leonardo da Vinci
Image sourced from: here.
What with climate change and the imminent threat of nuclear apocalypse, I suppose now is a good time to decide which artwork I’d take with me to another planet. I asked a fellow art student earlier when we were in the National Gallery. He said he’d take one of his own paintings. As this would be the only planet-earth-produced painting the “aliens” had ever seen, Tom would immediately be declared the greatest artist on Earth. Smart, I thought. Very smart. I considered stealing his idea for my own – that’s what artists do, isn’t it?
But I have a better plan. I’ve got to think practically. An explorer must always be prepared. Prepared for whatever this unknown planet might throw at her. For my idea to work, I must go on the assumption that the aliens have superpowers. This is more than likely. To prove my point: Narnia, Wonderland, and Bowie’s Labrynth. I think that’s enough evidence to go by. People on other planets have magical powers. This means that they will be able to bring my painting to life.
With my explorer’s hat firmly on my head, I thought…which painting contains the most things that will guarantee my survival on Other Earth? I need to be prepared for anything and everything.
I need an army.
So it’s got to be The Last Supper (providing I can get it off the wall of the Santa Maria). I have always, always wanted to be friends with Jesus’ disciples. They just seem so cool. I think of them as BC’s all male version of Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zero’s: sexy, spiritual, sandal-wearing hippies with long hair, great tans and some wicked stories. We are definitely going to get along. I already have a pair of sandals, and I did RS GCSE, so it’s a match made in heaven. Roll on camping trips and philosophical conversations around a campfire. Bringing The Last Supper to life on Other Earth is my chance to be the thirteenth disciple. It’s going to be out of this world.
Back in practical research mode, I looked into it on Wikipedia. They’re going to be the perfect army. Peter and Andrew can catch the fish. James had a real temper, so he can be on security. Philip can perform the miracles and Bartholomew travelled a lot, so he would probably be handy with the compass. Thomas seems like a really loyal guy. Matthew used to have the boys over for meals, which means he must be a great chef. As for the other James, (there were two) according to Hegesippus from the second century, he was nicknamed “James the Just”. He was a pious, tee-total veggie with a beard. Sounds like fun. Now Jude. In the RC Church, Jude is the patron saint of desperate cases and lost causes. Perfect. Judas Iscariot is a bit of a worry, but if everything goes a bit Hunger Games we can just eat him first. Oh and then of course there’s Jesus. He can turn water into wine. Enough said.
Sorry Leonardo, I haven’t chosen your painting for its painterly ingenuity. But I’m sorted and ready to go. Tomorrow I will remind Tom that fame and success are very different things. And that the world is but a canvas to the imagination.
Nell sells insulting Christmas cards on the side of her Fine Arts degree at City & Guilds. Whilst waiting for her Christmas present of a Mr Tumnus-style flute, she will be spending the winter drinking mulled cider, crocheting and generally indulging in (festive?!) conspiracy theories. She also has a pink bike called Pinky.
This piece is a part of Season V of PTL which is run in association with: All About Trans.
We encourage all of our readers to donate to this season’s organisation: Gendered Intelligence.
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